Confessions
of a
Facebook
Addict
By Hugh Delehanty
I realized I had a problem when I found
myself, off on a dream vacation,
sneaking into the bathroom at 3:00 A.M.
Portrait
by Chris Mueller
Digital illustration
by Bryan Christie Design
to check my homepage. This was no ordinary bathroom:
it was a luxurious all-white mini-spa with an oversize Italian-
ate tub, deep-purple orchids and votive candles everywhere,
I closed the door gently to avoid waking my wife, Barbara, the lightest sleeper on the
planet, and opened my laptop. And there it was, a short sentence that I never expected
to see: “Hugh and Hugh Jackman are now friends.”
Yes, this was the real Hugh Jackman, or at least it looked that way from the picture. I felt
giddy and a little flushed. Not because I had any interest in actually relating to Hugh Two
(as I later came to call him). In fact, the thing I liked best about the guy was his first name.
But I knew that Hugh Two was one heck of a great Facebook “get.” Adding his name to my
list of friends would instantly improve my Hollywood cred and make it easier for me to
enlist other A-list friends. And that’s exactly what happened. Within days Richard Gere,
Julianne Moore, Warren Buffet, and several other celebrities—well, okay, obvious impos-
