SINCE
TURNING
55,
But some in the no-Botox crowd worry that our fixation
with wrinkles has gone too far and that denying who we
are isn’t healthy. Last year, in an interview with Elle, even
Julia Roberts complained about our culture’s obsession with
Botox, saying, “Women don’t even give themselves a chance
to see what they’ll look like as older persons.”
I’ve come to view the lines on my face and
neck the same way I think of the weeds in
my garden: an annoyance best discour-
aged with diligent maintenance. Twice a
day I lather with a $47 “age-defying” collagen cream. Last
year a couple of rounds of Botox injections smoothed the
crease between my eyebrows—but now it’s back, and if
I had an extra $25,000 I might go all the way and have a face-
lift. But that’s me, a member of the American demographic
that sociologists say feels the most pressure to look younger:
unmarried, post- 50 women. I’m also part of another pres-
sured group: professionals seeking job promotions. I worry
that the older I appear, the more likely my 30-something
friends are to lose interest in me, that employers might not
hire me, that men will no longer find me attractive. The pres-
sure further mounts thanks to where I live—image-obsessed
Los Angeles—where “stars” like Kim Kardashian are idol-
ized. On the Westside there seem to be more plastic surgeons
per square mile than dentists.
Our preoccupation with looking younger, say experts
on aging, suggests there’s something wrong with the aging person. “Focusing only on loss implies that individuals
who are aging are less of who they once were, and it fosters
negative societal stereotypes of older adults,” says Debra
Sellers, Ph.D., associate professor in Kansas State University’s School of Family Studies and Human Services.
Others suggest that our pursuit of youthful appearance is
just the latest in a history of appearance-altering practices
among Americans. In the early 20th century, for example,
food shortages were not uncommon, which made being fat
a status symbol: A wide waist showed you had big cash—for
Even outside L.A., few are immune to our society’s
obsession with youthful appearance, though how we deal
with that varies from the rational—“I can’t stop aging, so why
worry?”—to the ridiculous. No offense to Angelina Jolie, but
her bee-stung lips (which are purportedly natural) fueled a
now passé plastic surgery craze that frequently produced
profiles akin to Donald Duck’s.
Many of us (at least until we’re in our later 60s, the experts say) adopt a proactive “It’s better to do something
than nothing” approach. In 2010, even as the economy
still floundered, American consumers spent $832 million on antiaging skin creams and underwent more than
13 million cosmetic procedures, up 5 percent from 2009.
Though the majority of those who opted for surgery were
female, the number of face-lifts performed on men
jumped 14 percent during that time period. Twenty-eight
percent of the cosmetic procedures performed in 2010
were on 51- to 64-year-olds—second only to the 35- to
50-year-old age group.
“Since looking old affects our social status, we want to
keep passing for younger,” says Toni Calasanti, Ph.D., a sociology professor in Virginia Tech’s College of Liberal Arts &
Human Sciences and coauthor of Gender, Social Inequalities,
and Aging. So we dye our hair, watch our weight, bleach our
teeth, and cover up facial lines with cosmetics or smooth
them out with plastic surgery. Medical intervention has
gone from questionable to acceptable: Half of all Americans,
regardless of income, now say they approve of it.
ADDITIONAL PHOTO CREDI TS ON PAGE 94
BONNIE SALVO
CHICAGO, ILLINOIS
SCHOOL SOCIAL WORKER
“My philosophy is that
beauty comes from
within. In my field, I’ve
worked with a lot of people who are gorgeous on
the outside but their self-image is so poor. I have a
good self-image—I’m a
good person and respected in my field, so all that
makes me feel good. I’m
feeling okay about turning 53. I’m not welcoming
wrinkles; I’m using moisturizer. If I see an ad in
a magazine that says
something will make you
look younger, I’ll try it.
I don’t know if I’d ever get
[plastic] surgery. Maybe
10 years from now. I’m
not against it, but right
now it’s not a priority.”
DANNY
YAMAMOTO
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA
DRUMMER
“The only thing that
scares me a little about
aging is general physical
decline. To that end, I work
out. I’m an avid runner.
I started in my mid-20s,
and it stuck. I love to run
outside in the sun, and
maybe in a few years I’m
going to get really wrin-
kled—but that’s not going
to keep me from running.
I think my ego boost
comes from knowing that
there aren’t too many
people my age who can
run 10 miles and not die
the next day! But I don’t
get off being the center
of attention unless I’m
doing a drum solo. Making
music, that’s my passion.”
