healthy people, many still with careers,” says Frileck. “They
don’t want how they look to hold them back.”
In our 30s we worried more about our hips and bellies;
after 50 we become concerned with our faces. Our eyelids
begin to droop, our lips get thinner, our skin loses its fullness
and elasticity. It happens on a deep, cellular level—and it hap-
pens to everyone. The loss of fat in the face is the most defin-
ing change, and it can leave people looking gaunt; the skin
wrinkles and sags without its support. Ironically, for years
the sought-after result of a face-lift was a taut, cadaverlike
look, but these days surgeons often inject fat under the skin
to produce a plump, somewhat childlike result.
The quest to look younger has much to do with class
and race. A preoccupation with one’s looks is still a luxury
of those who have money, and it remains predominantly
a white phenomenon. Research suggests that African
American women (who, as with all people of color, enjoy
skin rich in melanin, which guards against age-related
damage) are more accepting of their looks, but those who
choose cosmetic surgery most commonly elect rhinoplasty
or liposuction. Asians, reportedly in an attempt to improve
their social standing by looking more Westernized, tend
to have eyelid surgery more than most other procedures.
Hispanics seem to focus more on their shape, preferring
liposuction and breast augmentation.
that interfering with God’s handiwork is sinful and vain.
Despite this, we’re still largely an age-obsessed nation—
and we’re not the only one. According to the Interna-
tional Society of Aesthetic Plastic Surgery, countries
such as Brazil, South Korea, Hungary, and Belgium
share our fixation. The numbers are significantly low-
er in developing nations. “You’re not worried about
your face if you’re spending your days surviving,” says
Calasanti. “Part of what makes Western society differ-
ent from other places is that we have a strong belief in
individual responsibility. You can make changes; therefore
you’re responsible for making them. Phrases like giving up
and letting yourself go are direct moral statements.”
And what you think about aging affects how you age.
Studies show that teenagers who view aging negatively
develop negative perceptions of themselves when they’re
older. In the end, our craving for youthful skin is really
about loss, says Janos Kalla, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist
in Santa Monica, California. “Aging involves being able to
adjust to multiple losses—friends, career, physical losses
like muscle mass and estrogen,” explains Kalla. “Under-
neath it all is the fear of our own death.”
The hallmarks of successful aging, Kalla believes, are
loving relationships, relatively good health, and a zestful
approach to life. Spiritual teachers such as Eckhart Tolle,
and a husband who adores me and thinks I’m still hot.”
The next age-defying trend will likely involve gene
therapy. Scientists came a step closer to turning back the
aging process last year by using a gene-therapy technique to
rejuvenate worn-out organs in prematurely-aged mice. By
the time such techniques are accepted for human use, most
of us now in our 50s probably won’t care. Statistics suggest
that resignation and acceptance of the aging process kicks
in sometime in the second half of our 60s. At that point,
perhaps, we’ll see the wisdom in Robert Browning’s poetic
assertion that “The best is yet to be, the last of life, for which
the first was made.” ;
Get tips and techniques for staying young
in body and in mind at aarp.org/bodyimage.
“I FEEL loved. I HAVE
GOOD FRIENDS AND A
HUSBAND WHO ADORES
ME AND THINKS I’M
STILL HOT.”
But here’s some encouraging news: Though each year
many more of us buy into the antiage craze, polls show that
millions of holdouts care more about being healthy than
looking younger. Those who resist using artificial means
to shave years off their appearance tend to reside in rural
areas, and in the South and Northeast (with the exception of
major urban centers such as Boston and New York), where
tradition-bound populations disapprove of meddling with
nature. Deeply held moral and religious beliefs also play a
role. Buddhists, who acknowledge the impermanence of all
things, are more likely to accept the face-changing inevitability of aging, as are devout Christians, who tend to believe
