Forge a Fab Foursome
Making friends with couples can help your marriage
L
FROM TOP: JACK HOLLINGS WOR TH/CORBIS; ILLUS TRATION B Y SCOT T Y REIFSN YDER
LUCY AND RICK Y
were pals with Fred
and Ethel on the TV
show I Love Lucy.
Now we know they were on to something: Being friends with other couples
can improve your relationship, report the authors of the new book Two Plus
Two: Couples and Their Couple Friendships. That’s because these friendships
boost partners’ attraction to and appreciation of each other, say University
of ;Maryland researchers Kathleen Holtz Deal, Ph.D., and Geoffrey Greif,
Ph.D., who based their research on interviews with 426 heterosexual participants. The best time to make new friends? Now, because you likely have more
free time than you had in previous years, says Deal. Just make sure you and
your partner want the same things. For instance, many couples prefer
to limit interactions to light entertainment, such as movie outings, while
others want emotional support. Says Greif: “Both styles can work for couples
in helping to build a better marriage.” —Tina Adler
It’s natural to make assumptions, but don’t overdo it. Having prejudices about
people can cause you to miss opportunities, a new study in the journal PLoS ONE
finds. Researchers from ETH Zurich, a university in Switzerland, used
game theory to test simulated characters’ willingness to
cooperate with others. In long-lasting games, prejudiced
characters missed more chances for cooperation. People
who are prejudiced “perform poorly in complex situations
because they fail to incorporate nuances or changes,” ex-
plains researcher Thomas Chadefaux, Ph.D. So take time to
learn more about others instead of relying on assumptions.
That guy with the rough-looking Mohawk may actually be
a nurturing caregiver. —Leslie Quander Wooldridge
THE PROBLEM WITH PREJUDICE
